after the storm..

pull her out of the rubbles
will you
be careful with her fragile mind
her body yet so young
has suffered
enough, without words
no reason
will ever make her
understand


the roaring wind
turned
her world upside down
one surge of the tides
made her lose
both their hands


one day the sky will clear
perhaps, then she will forget
or maybe she will
vaguely remember
and she may ask for them
search where they have gone


tell her, will you?
tell her they've gone
they protected her and died
they died, for her
to see the sun

life and where you left

may the candle burn slow
tonight,
as i fumble through
random conversations
of scattered days
and nights
and hours in between,

may the wind come
in whispers,
tonight, as i search
your voice
amongst the ruffling leaves
and your touch
in the warm breeze

may the stars not tire
tonight,
as i trace the last
path we traveled,
the last laughter we had
amongst the living
pebbles and stones
and butterflies

may these tears fail
tonight,
to vanish the smile
you drew in my heart
and a promise
not life can keep
because forever stays
and that's where
you live

para sa tatay ko

ang gusto ko sana, isulat ang kwento mo. para maipagmalaki ko sa mundo kung gaano ka kagaling. at kung gaano ka kahusay. gusto kong isipin na isa ako sa mga pinalad na makilala ka ng lubos. at masaksihan ng halos buo ang lahat ng laban na sinabak mo. gusto kong ilarawan ang lahat ng sugat na tiniis mo ang sakit. kung paanong ang iba dito ay naghilom na, at ang ilan ay mananatiling sariwa. gusto kong ikuwento na sa maraming yugto ng buhay mo, sa mga nakasubaybay, marami ang humanga, may ilan ding naghusga. may mga natuwa na makita kang matagumpay, at ang ilan ay naghihintay pa ng pagbaliktad ng tadhana, kung paano ka, sa gitna ng lahat ng ito, nanatiling hindi natitinag. alam ko namang may mga panahong nakaramdam ka ng panghihina, pero madalas tinatalo mo pati ang sarili mo, pinangingibabawan ang lahat ng takot at itinutuloy ang laban ng walang pagdadalawang isip. handa ulit sa lahat ng haharaping hirap at pasakit. handa ulit na hangaan o husgahan. handa ulit sa lahat, anuman ang naghihintay.

ang gusto ko sana, ikwento ang buhay na isinulat mo. gamit ang sangkaterbang pawis at di birong tagas  dugo sa gitna ng kumakalam na tiyan, walang yaman na ipagmamalaki, tangan lang ang talino at tapang.

pero may takot ako. baka hindi nila maintindihan. pano ba gagawing kuwento ang buhay na buhay din ang puhunan? hindi sasapat ang mga salitang natutunan ko. hindi papantay ang lahat ng natutunan sa eskwelahan sa buhay mong karanasan.

siguro, sa ngayon, sapat munang malaman mo, sa aming lahat na nagmamahal sayo at sa aming lahat na minamahal mo, hindi masasayang lahat ng hirap, hindi matatapon ang pawis at dugong ibinigay mo sa lahat mong laban, hindi matatapos ang kuwento. patuloy ka naming sasaksaihan, susubaybayan at aalalayan. patuloy ka naming ipagmamalaki. at sa paraang kaya namin, hindi man katumbas ng kaya mo, patuloy ka naming ipaglalaban.

when love was

i would like to go back to a time when love did not need words to be understood; when its meaning was universal; when it required no conditions; when it was oblivious to cold nights and love songs; when it was stranger to pain and detachment; when it sought not joy nor death; when it basked in rain and sun with equal zest; when it did not fear the dawn nor the twilight; when it came in dreams; when it was sure of itself; when it stood proud and brave;

i would like to go back to a time when love was just love, nothing else...

our moment

this is not the right moment
we both know that
our time belongs to a life
after this, a morrow yet promised

this is but a time borrowed
from the days that will be ours
from an eternity we are to share
from the next life time

it will soon pass, time will again
run against us, there might be sadness
after, there will be tears
there will be sorrow
when the fleeting joy ends...

right or not, this is ours
a moment we can claim
a brief sneak into the life
that we will make perfect, together
we shall spend endless in love

random 01

if i deleted everything from my past,
will you sync your present with mine
and claim a space to create anew
memories that this time wont have to be
archived?

tonight i mourn...

it was

an open heart drowned 

in its own blood

pulsating the last

strokes of madness

gasping..reaching out

till the final minute

struggling, hoping..

waiting

a final stab that will

stop the bleeding

or a judgment that 

reasons pain..

nothing

only the veiled darkness remained

staggering breaths 

in reckless silence.

damp, cold, alone 

angry and cursed!

tonight i mourn

because you left

and you chose 

a painful death

write!

write!
until you've emptied your soul
until your heart beats only words
losing, their meaning,
the gaps and pauses - in between

write!
because an end has to be written
because silence cannot speak
because there is a truth in every lie
and a lie in every promise


write!
until your pen cries in matte black,
devoid, of red blood's charm...
before the last rainbow sleeps

because the world awaits time
and when it stops, to read

noncomittal

between doubts and uncertainties
we know we have the answers
but we wait..
we wait till they speak out
we wait till they touch us
burn us!
we wait, sometimes
eternal...

just for tonight

just for tonight, she leaves
the blank pages untouched
and leafs through the old ones
singing loudly of the past

just for tonight, she touches
the scars vaguely remembered
of an unnamed child, lost
in wanton squander of youth

 just for tonight, she bids back
words she failed to save
from the mocking silence,
and lies
of a love that was

just for tonight, she refuses
an end.